A: As the song says "Get a haircut, and get a real job!" If that doesn't work, or you are retired, or you are hairless, it's time for plan B. Here are some Helpful (Twisted) Hints:
Borrow a job: I'm not suggesting you pretend to be someone else and go to their job - I think they tried that on "I Love Lucy" and Lucy got in big trouble. But you could just visit a friend and have some surprise rubber chicken fun.
Charity work: Do you volunteer for some good cause? Take your rubber chicken the next time you volunteer and make it an even better cause.
Go hunting: For a job, we mean. And take your rubber chicken with you. Some of our best entries in past years have been built around the job hunt (see above).
Stay at home Mom or Dad? Most important job in the world! (No really!) Take your rubber chicken along during your parental activities, you might be amazed at how useful a rubber chicken can be.
Or, just do something. Really. We're just looking for funny pictures of rubber chickens.
Q: I don't have rubber chicken! What do I do? Oh, the humanity!
A: Don't panic! Sit down and I'll explain. Rubber chickens are a common pet toy (why shouldn't Fido also have a laugh now and then?) and are available wherever pet supplies are sold - even at Tar-jay and W-W-W-Walmart.
Q: What is the best way to submit my photos or video?
A: I must have your email address to award a prize, so naturally the best way is by email to firstname.lastname@example.org. Attach the file(s) to the email, and send more than one email if you need to.
You may of course instead post your pictures to Facebook, You Tube, Flickr, or whatever tickles your fancy (but please, don't send pictures of you tickling your fancy with a rubber chicken) (unless of course it's your job to tickle fancies with a rubber chicken) (you know, something like that could go viral) (just saying).